SweetieGames

I’ve always loved RPGs; I’ve played plenty in my time, and I’m particularly fond of those that let me create my own character. The creative writer in me is eager to come up with extensive lore relating to my character’s place in the world before they started their adventure in the game. I love researching areas within the game itself and their customs, so my character can be as lore-accurate as possible.

Throughout the years, I’ve had multiple friends hooked on Final Fantasy XIV, the franchise’s hugely successful MMORPG. Everyone who I knew played XIV would talk about how addicting it was, and that you could play a good chunk of the game for free before having to pay for the full version. When a friend suggested I download the game so we could play together, I finally caved to see what all the fuss was about.

Final Fantasy XIV is my first foray into MMORPGs. I usually prefer to play my games solo and explore at my own pace. If it works for me and I’m progressing, that’s all that matters. I also downloaded the game onto my seven-year-old PlayStation 4. This means that I’m navigating FFXIV on a controller; something that I don’t see many people doing, probably for good reason.

After I spent about an hour crafting my character to perfection and frantically Googling names that make sense with the lore of the game, I was finally setting foot in Gridania for the first time… and I was overwhelmed pretty quickly. Selecting things is more difficult on a controller than it is with a mouse and it took a couple of attempts to start a conversation with the NPCs. Despite my initial nervousness, I soon got the hang of the controller buttons, using the PS4 trackpad as a mouse to click things, and the hotbar, which I had never used before. I think what pushed me through was seeing the seasoned, cooler players who are super strong and have nice outfits, pets and titles. I want to be the person that new players see and think “damn, they look cool.” My Miqo’te Conjurer is now Level 31 and I love him a lot.

I was feeling pretty confident in my Conjurer. I usually adventure alone, and was pretty happy with my approach; use Stone II on enemies to deal damage, and use my plethora of healing abilities when necessary. It was working for me. Then came the time where I unlocked dungeons.

My first attempt at a dungeon I completed with NPCs, which was fine. The next dungeon I decided to brave with other players, something I usually avoid, just to see what it was like. I regretted it. It was extremely obvious to the other party members that it was my first time in this dungeon and I was unsure what they wanted from me. I turned away for a couple of seconds to read the tutorial screen and two of the party members died, which is what I was meant to be preventing as the one Conjurer of the team. Selecting people or enemies when there’s a lot going on is clunkier on the PS4, as you either have to click on them with the cursor using the trackpad or scroll up/down or left/right on the D-pad until you’re selecting the right thing, and I haven’t quite nailed selecting things quickly yet. I tried to do my regular technique of casting Stone II on enemies until my healing services were required, and the others started talking in the chatbox about how the healer was not healing but dealing damage, and that they were going to have to go slow for me. Turns out all they wanted me to do was stand back and spam the Medica spell so nobody ever went much under full health. Nobody in the party was outright rude, but when I saw them talking about me and my lack of experience in the chatbox, I panicked. I don’t want to be holding people back.

I get that healing is my main priority as the Conjurer, but it would be nice to feel a little involved in the action itself. I was so embarrassed, especially as I had forgotten to plug my external keyboard in so I couldn’t even respond to the people talking about me. Using emotes is slower on the PS4 too, so when one of the nicer members waved at me and patted my little Miqo’te head at the end of the dungeon, I couldn’t respond in time before they left. Thank you, whoever that was!

Not all my interactions have left me feeling ashamed of my lack of experience. In fact, I’d say the majority of the people I’ve interacted with have been lovely. Even if we don’t talk, we jump up and down in front of each other and wave at each other before going back to our tasks. I was completing a task with my friend who introduced me to the game, and a stranger also got stuck in with defeating enemies before having a nice conversation with us. A Level 100 Viera stopped in front of me the other day and was showing off their unique emotes to me in a secluded corner of Limsa Lominsa. I think they were just trying to flex all their cool stuff, but I would want to do that too if I had paid what I think this person had paid for all their extra gear.

I think I put a lot of pressure on myself to be as good as the people who have been playing FFXIV for years. That’s not going to happen in a matter of days or weeks. It’s nice to play a game where most people seem friendly and eager to help out new players. I might try a multiplayer dungeon again once I fully get the hang of the controls on PlayStation. I may be a Conjurer, but please let me be involved in the action too!